Torn
by sexymama25
Summary: Dylan made a choice but he's still torn between maintaining his relationship with Brenda and keeping Kelly happy. Will his friendship with Brenda end Dylan and Kelly or will he realize that he chose wrong.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

I sit in my room the whole weekend ignoring all the phone calls especially the ones from Kelly. How dare she call me worried about me she's the reason I'm miserable. Brandon's stuck his head in a few times and I bit it off literally and he never bothered me again. I just sit listening to losing my religion over and over again remembering the first time me and Dylan broke up. It's Sunday night and I no everyone's wondering what's going to happen tomorrow but I honestly don't know all I know is that I am so angry.

"Hey, Brenda could you catch a ride with Dad to school tomorrow I've got to be there early" Brandon says sticking his head in nervously.

"Okay whatever" I say going back to listening and cutting up pictures.

"Brenda some people were asking about you at the peach Pit" Brandon says nervously.

"Like who" I ask.

"Donna, Andrea, Dylan, and Kelly" Brandon says.

"Tell, Andrea, Donna, and Dylan I said hi" I reply back.

Brandon leaves the room and I go back to moping. I mean I knew he would chose eventually I just never really thought he would chose her over me I guess I didn't mean as much to Dylan as I thought I did. Now I understand what he meant when he says love hurts because nothing hurts worst than seeing the man you love with someone else and that's what I'm going to have to face tomorrow. The next morning Dad drops me off at school I put on a brave face as I head inside to my locker. I look up to see Dylan and Kelly kissing. I turn back around and shut my locker knowing that I have to walk past them to get to class.

"Hey, Bren how are you" Dylan says as I walk past them I ignore him and keep walking.

I head to my Spanish class and take a seat in the back I just remembered I have this class with Kelly and Dylan. The two walk into the classroom and take their seats. I listen to the lesson and leave as soon as class is over trying to avoid them.

"Brenda please talk to me don't shut me out like this" Kelly says behind me.

I turn and glare at her not believing her nerve how dare she the little boyfriend stealing bitch.

"What more do you want Kelly you have Dylan did you really think we would be friends after this?" I say before walking away.

I continue through school and I'm fine Kelly and Dylan both leave me alone then I head to lunch. I walk over to our usual table and sit down. Soon the others join us. Everything's cool until Kelly decides she wants to molest Dylan in front of my face.

"I'm going to sit somewhere else" I say stomping off to another table.

I hear the raised voices from the table I left as I walk away but I don't care it's taking everything in me not to cry. I knew it was going to be hard and I knew it was going to hurt but I never thought it would hurt this much. I say as I finally sit at an empty table far away from my old one.

Meanwhile back at the other table everyone is glaring at Kelly and Dylan.

"How could you do that it was hard enough getting her to come to school today" Brandon says angrily.

"I didn't do anything I just kissed my boyfriend" Kelly defends angrily.

"Oh please Kelly everyone knows you're rubbing it in Brenda's face that you won" Steve says angrily.

"I am not" Kelly defends.

"Then why did you kiss Dylan knowing that Brenda was sitting right here" Donna says.

"Come on guys she's going to have to get use to seeing me and Dylan kiss eventually" Kelly says.

"You know what Kel you really are a bitch" Brandon says before grabbing his tray and walking over to join his sister.

"God I don't know what his problem is" Kelly says.

"You're his problem and the fact that you enjoy hurting his sister" Andrea says getting up and going over to the table with Brenda and Brandon.

"Okay well at least that's over" Kelly says.

"You know what Kelly I thought you would at least care about you ex-best friends feelings but I guess the only thing you care about is Dylan" Donna says getting up and leaving the table.

"So are you going to call me names and leave too Steve and David" Kelly asks angrily.

"Kelly I've always stood by you and I always will I'm your brother" David says.

"Hey, Kel I'll be honest what you did a few minutes ago was cruel and heartless but you know I'd never abandon you no matter what you do" Steve says.

"Thanks guys" Kelly says.

Then Kelly realizes that Dylan hasn't said anything this whole time.

"Dylan are you okay" Kelly asks.

"Don't do that again around Brenda Kelly this is hard enough for her as it is" Dylan says before getting up and walking back into the school.

Kelly looks over to the table where Brandon, Brenda, Donna, and Andrea are sitting and feels guilty as she sees Brandon wrap his arm around Brenda.

I can't do this as soon as lunch is over I head to the office to go home. As I am waiting outside for my Mom to come and get me I hear a voice that I would recognize anywhere.

"Bren what are you doing out here shouldn't you be in class" Dylan says sitting beside me.

I turn away trying to ignore him.

"Bren don't be like this" Dylan says in a pleading voice.

"What do you want from me huh Dylan you choice and I'm living with it but don't expect things to be like they used to because they're not so please just leave me alone talking to you hurts, looking at you hurts, being around you hurts and God I wish I didn't still love you but I do and that hurts because it kills me to see you with Kelly. I scream just as my mom pulls up.

I rush to the car leaving Dylan sitting on the front steps of West Beverly Hills High. I know I shouldn't have said that but I'm tired of holding in my feelings I need to be honest I need to let people know how I feel.

"Brenda honey are you okay" Mom asks me.

"No, I'm not okay" I finally admit breaking down into tears.

Mom drives me home as I cry she walks me upstairs to my room and sits down with me.

"You want to talk about it sweetie" Mom asks.

"Mom it hurts so much how do I stop loving him please help me stop loving him" I plead with my mother as more tears falls.

"Sweetheart I wish I could take away your pain I really do and I wish I could make you stop loving him but I can't" Mom says sadly.

"It's okay Mom I'm feeling a lot better now" I say wiping my tears away.

"Brenda don't ever hide your feelings from us sweetie tell us how you're feeling we might not be able to fix it but we can listen okay" Mom says.

"Thanks Mom I will I promise" I say before lying down and falling asleep.

I awake to auguring downstairs.

"You are the last person she wants to see right now haven't you hurt my daughter enough huh Dylan" Jim yells angrily.

"Jim I'm sorry but I need to talk to Bren" Dylan says.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"It's okay Dad I'll talk to him" I say from the top of the stairs.

"Are you sure honey" Jim says nervously.  
>"Yeah, Dad I'll be fine" I say walking down the stairs.<p>

"Well I'll be in the kitchen if you need me" Dad says glaring at Dylan one last time before walking into the kitchen.

"You need to talk to me so what do you have to say" I ask.

"Bren you shocked me today at school I mean I didn't get a chance to say anything back you at least owe me the opportunity to explain" Dylan says.

"I don't owe you anything McKay I think I've given you quite enough" I say angrily.

"I'm sorry it came out wrong please just hear me out Bren" Dylan says pleadingly.

"Fine say what you have to say and then leave me alone" I say angrily.

"Okay if you still feel that way then I'll leave you alone" Dylan says.

"Fine" I say.

"Bren this was not an easy decision for me to make as I have told you and Kelly both I love you both. Then when your Dad made a big deal about you coming to the party and Kelly showed up I had promised you guys a decision that night and I made it partly because you didn't show up I chose Kelly because it was easy with her no drama. I made a choice and now I have to stick with it so I'm begging you to understand" Dylan pleads.

I look at him angrily and upset about how he made that choice.

"I can't believe you made a decision just because I didn't show up once. Who was there for you when you father was carted off to prison. Who was there for you when your mom came to live with you. Who was there for you through everything and this is how you thank me by choosing Kelly because she was there once when I wasn't you have a lot of nerve McKay that's for damn sure" I yell angrily.

"Bren please I need you in my life" Dylan pleads.

"Well I'm sorry Dylan I just can't do it anymore I want play this game anymore and you obviously don't need me because you chose Kelly" I say angrily turning my back on him.

"Just because I chose her doesn't mean I still don't love you Bren" Dylan says turning me around to face him he leans down and captures my lips I melt for a second then push him away.

"No I want do what Kelly did I want be the other woman Dylan like you said you made a choice and now you need to stick with it you chose Kelly and that cost you me now please leave Dylan" I plead.

"Tell me you don't love me and I'll walk away" Dylan says.

"I can't say I don't love you because I still do but it doesn't change anything you're with Kelly now and I want betray her like she did me" I say leaving the living room and going back to my room.

I hear the front door shut and I break down crying again. I touch my lips where he had kissed me. It would have been so easy to let him continue, but I couldn't even though I hate Kelly I couldn't hurt her the same way she hurt me.


	3. Chapter 3

_Hey thanks for reading my story the more reviews I get the sooner I will update. Hope you enjoy Chapter 3 it's a real emotional one._

Chapter 3

Two weeks later everything is okay I still cry myself to sleep but it doesn't hurt nearly as much as it once did I'm still not speaking to Kelly. Even after Irises visit I couldn't bring myself to speak to that back stabbing bitch. I still wore the crystal that she gave me though. I turned on the television and gasp as what I see.

"What is it honey?" Mom asks running into the living room.

On the television screen is Jack McKay and his car exploded at the marina the eye witness was his son Dylan. I feel tears prick my eyes as I begin to cry. Poor Dylan I think as I sit there and listen to the rest of the story.

"Did you see the news Jim" Mom asks when Jim gets home.

"No, why what happened" Dad asks.

"It's about Dylan's Dad" Cindy says.

"What was he arrested again for embezzlement or did he blow Dylan's trust fund already" Jim says snidely.

"Dad stop he's dead" I say.

Jim looks at me shocked for a second and then turns to Cindy who nods his head.

"What happened?" Jim asks.

"It appears that he was blown up in his car early this morning they're saying it was a mob hit and Dylan was the eye witness" Cindy says.

"OhmyGod that poor boy" Jim says.

I walk away to leave my parents to talk I pick up the phone several times to call Dylan, but I can't do it. I sit in my room and think. Then the next day I see on the news where the reporters are staked out on his lawn. I can't let him go through this alone I think before heading downstairs to talk to my parents.

"Mom, Dad I think Dylan should come and stay with us again for a little while until things settles down again" I say.

Both Dad and Mom look at me nervously.

"Are you sure about this Brenda" Jim asks.

"Yes, Dad go get him and bring him home I don't want him going through this alone" I say.

"Okay honey" Jim says heading out to get Dylan.

Meanwhile at Dylan's house Kelly is trying to make Dylan feel better. They start kissing when there's a knock on the door.

"Not now" Dylan yells before storming back into his bedroom.

Kelly opens the door and comes face to face with Mr. Walsh she hasn't seen him since the whole fiasco.

"Get inside Mr. Walsh before they take your picture" Kelly says pulling Jim inside.

"How is he" Jim asks.

"He's not doing so well" Kelly says.

"Where is he" Jim asks.

"Back there" Kelly says pointing to his bedroom.

"Do you mind if I talk to him" Jim asks.

"No, go right ahead" Kelly says.

Jim walks back and sees Dylan putting stuff in a bag.

"I' m sorry son" Jim says.

"Me too" Dylan says.

"Where you going?" Jim asks.

"I don't know but I can't stay here" Dylan says.

"Well that's why I came over to ask you to come back and stay with us for a little while until things settle" Jim says.

"No offense sir but I don't think so Bren's made it perfectly clear that she wants nothing to do with me" Dylan says.

"Well I guess she has had a change of heart because she sent me to bring you back" Jim says.

"Okay then I stay as long as it's okay with Bren" Dylan says.

"Are you going to be okay Kelly" Jim asks as they are heading out the door.

"Yeah, I'll be fine I'm just going home" Kelly says heading towards her car.

Jim and Dylan push their way through the cameraman and get inside the car and head back to Casa Walsh.

"You know this is a really great thing you're doing letting Dylan stay here" Brandon says.

"Yeah I know I'm just a little scared" Brenda says.

"He is too Brenda" Brandon says.

"I think they're here" Cindy says as the back door opens and in walks Jim.

"Where's Dylan?" Cindy asks.

"He's looking at our back yard" Jim says.

Brandon walks outside to talk to Dylan. I head up to my room wondering what I've done can I really do this can I really be there for him after all he's done to me.

Meanwhile outside in the back yard Brandon is standing next to Dylan.

"Hey, D" Brandon says.

"Hey, B how you doing" Dylan says.

"How you doing" Brandon asks.

"I'm here" Dylan says.

"Do you want me to take these bags up for you" Brandon asks.

"What are you the bell boy now?" Dylan says.

"For you yeah" Brandon says.

"You know what I love about your back yard man"

"What?" Brandon asks.

"It looks the same today as it did yesterday and the day before and the day before that" Dylan says.

"You know us Walshes boring and predictable" Brandon says.

"All except one" Dylan says.

"Are you guys going to come inside its getting cold out here" I say looking at Dylan nervously.

"Yeah we coming" Brandon says grabbing Dylan's arm and pulling him towards the house.

We head upstairs to make his bed. I can tell Dylan is really upset.

"Bren I want to thank you for letting me stay here with you guys" Dylan says.

"No you don't have to thank me I want to apologize to you for letting my pride get in the way of doing the right thing" I say.

"I'm going to go get you another pillow" Brandon says hurriedly leaving the room.

"You no everything's going to be okay right" I say taking Dylan's hand.

"Keep telling me that Bren" Dylan says.

"Well I better get to bed we have to be up early tomorrow" I say nervously hurriedly walking out of the room to mine.

I twist and turn all night knowing that Dylan's right across the hall. I don't think I can do this but I know that I need to do this for him. I want abandon him when he needs me most. I think before finally falling into a restless sleep. I wake up when I hear a noise downstairs. I get up and head downstairs I see Dylan standing in front of the liquor cabinet.

"Dylan what are you doing up" I ask worriedly.

"Bren nothing I just couldn't sleep" Dylan says still looking at the liquor.

"Dylan maybe you should call your sponsor" I ask nervously.

"Oh please Bren what's he going to say I lost my Dad and I'm hurting alcohol will take away the pain why shouldn't I have some relief" Dylan yells angrily.

"Do you honestly think that drinking going to help you get rid of the pain well it's not Dylan and I want let you do it" I yell angrily.

"Why do you care anyway Bren" Dylan yells back.

"Because I love you and I want watch you self destruct please Dylan don't do this" I plead.

Dylan stares at me for a minute before heading back up to Brandon's room. I hurriedly lock the liquor cabinet and put the key in my bra for safe keeping before heading back upstairs for bed. The next morning I wake up bright and early and head downstairs for breakfast.

"What does Dylan like for breakfast?" Mom asks.

"Black Coffee" Brandon says.

"Dylan's really not a morning person mom" I say.

"Anyway he said he hadn't slept for two day but last night he was out like a light" Brandon says.

I don't mention what happened late last night and continue eating my breakfast.

"Well then I guess we'll let him sleep in" Cindy says.

Then Dad walks in with the newspaper.

"Is the news guy from channel 12 still out there" I ask

"No one's out there but this was out there" Jim says holding up the newspaper.

"What is it?" Cindy asks.

"A news story about Jack with Dylan's picture no less and there's two articles" Jim says.

"I don't think we should let Dylan see that today" I say.

"Me either I think he's had enough news for one week don't you" Cindy says.

"I agree" Brandon says throwing the paper away.

I head upstairs to check on Dylan. I see the light on in the bathroom. I knock gently.

"Come in" Dylan says.

I open the door and walk into the bathroom.

"You about ready" I ask.

"Do I have to wear this tie" Dylan asks.

"Not if you don't want to" I say.

"Shall we go" I ask.

"If you say so" Dylan says following me into my room.

He stops walking and looks around before speaking.

"You threw away all my stuff and took down all the pictures huh" Dylan asks.

"No, it's just packed away in a box in the garage" I say.

"Out of sight out of mind" Dylan says.

"Dylan you've never been out of my mind" I say looking at him intently.

"Bren if this didn't happen I wouldn't even be welcomed here and you probably still wouldn't be talking to me" Dylan says.

"Dylan honestly you and Kelly hurt me really badly, but it's nothing compared to what you're going through right now and anyway in the grand scheme of things years from now you'll look back and I'll just be some girl you knew in high school" I say.

"No you want Bren not after everything" Dylan says hugging me.

I close my eyes and smiles to myself as I pull away. I don't want to leave his arms but I know I have to.

"That's nice to know" I say.

"Do me a favor Bren help me tie this thing" Dylan says holding out the tie.

I hurriedly tie the tie and we head downstairs to join my family so we can leave for the funeral home. I know this is going to be one of the hardest days of Dylan's life and I'll be there for him no matter how much it hurts me. I think before taking my seat next to Dylan in the pew. The service is over quickly soon everyone is heading back to Casa Walsh for the reception. I immediately notice that Dylan's on edge.

"Can I get you anything Dylan" I ask worriedly.

"Not right now Bren but thanks" Dylan says.

I head back in the kitchen to start cleaning up I have managed to avoid Kelly all day. I am in the kitchen cleaning when I hear a commotion outside. I see Dylan storming into the house. I hurriedly go after him and am about to walk into the living room when I hear David talking.

"You know what Dylan I feel like I know you now I mean it wasn't my Dad or anything but I was in the room when Scott accidentally blew himself away and all I wanted to do was get high or drunk but then I realized something that you can't run from what's in your head" David says.

"You're right come on let's go join the others" Dylan says.

I hurriedly head back into the kitchen cleaning when I hear my mom and Dylan and David in the dining room getting food.

"Dylan it's your Uncle Frank" Jim says.

I know something's off because Dylan doesn't have an Uncle Frank but I don't worry about it. Until an hour later when I see Brandon but no sign of Dylan.

"Brandon do you know where Dylan is" I ask worriedly.

"He just needed some fresh air sis he's fine" Brandon says but I can tell he's worried.

I am practically pacing back and forth waiting watching worrying. When I hear my Dad and Dylan I sigh with relief as I continue eating my butter pecan ice cream.

"Hey you want some" I ask.

"What flavor?" Dylan asks.

"Butter Pecan" I say giving him my spoon to lick off.

"Yeah, I'd like some" Dylan says getting a spoon and eating ice-cream with me.

"Hey, D did you find what you were looking for" Brandon asks.

"Yeah B, I did" Dylan says throwing Brandon his keys.

"Well I'm going to bed goodnight you two" Brandon says.

I finish eating the ice cream and get up and walk over to the sink and start washing the bowl I feel Dylan standing behind me.

"Thank you Bren for everything especially last night I don't know how I would survive without you in my life" Dylan says his breath washing over my neck.

"Dylan I'll always be there for you when you need me no matter what you can always count on me" I say before kissing his cheek and leaving the room.

I wipe a single tear from my cheek as I walk away from the love of my life knowing that I will love him forever no matter what he will always hold my heart.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

The following week Dylan moves back to his house and things haven't changed much Kelly and Dylan are still tight as ever but I can handle it better for Dylan sake even though I'm still not speaking to his bitch of a girlfriend.

"So, Brenda I was wondering would you like to go out Friday night" A boy named Mark asks.

"No" I say before walking away to head to class.

"Damn Brenda that's like the 12th guy you've turned down this week" Steve says.

"Well Steve what can I say I'm a heart breaker" I say jokingly.

Everything's great until lunch when Kelly corners me in the girl's bathroom.

"Move" I say through gritted teeth.

"You know what Brenda you are being totally unfair I wasn't the only one that betrayed you but it appears Dylan's back on your good side and I'm still in the dog house" Kelly yells angrily.

"What do you want from me Kelly?" I yell angrily.

"I want you to talk to me I want us to go back to the way things used to be I want my best friend back" Kelly yells.

"Well that's never going to happen because best friends don't break promises and don't steal each other's boyfriends" I yell angrily.

"I didn't steal him you broke up with him remember" Kelly yells angrily.

"Fine, but you still broke a promise swearing to never go after Dylan and you did when I went to Paris" I yell angrily.

"Brenda I'm sorry I can't take back what's happened I just want us to get past this and be friends again" Kelly says.

"I'm sorry Kelly but I can't get past this" I say.

"You can forgive Dylan but not me" Kelly yells angrily.

"I can't hate him Kelly do you know how much I wish I could hate Dylan but I can't and that's that so would you please just move" I say angrily.

"Fine, Brenda" Kelly says moving out of my way so that I can walk to lunch.

I hurriedly head to an empty table by myself and sit down and a few minutes later I feel someone sitting beside me.

"Bren you're obviously upset tell me what's wrong" Dylan says.

"Nothing me and Kelly just got into it again she's made because I forgave you but want forgive her" I say.

"Bren" Dylan starts when Kelly walks up.

"Well isn't this cozy my boyfriend and his ex sitting a table together" Kelly says snidely.

"This is neither the time nor the place Kelly" Dylan says angrily.

"Oh so when is the time and the place huh you did the same thing I did but yet and still I'm public enemy number one to Brenda" Kelly yells angrily.

I get up and walk away not able to stop the tears from falling. I hear Dylan yelling my name but I continue to walk away until I'm in the parking lot in Brandon's car. That's where Brandon finds me that afternoon in the back seat of his car sound asleep. He doesn't ask what happens he just drives home. I wonder if my life will ever get better.

I watched as one of the most important people in my life walked away from me I turn my eyes back to Kelly and glare at her angrily.

"What am I supposed to keep my mouth shut she's been treating me like dirt for months and I am fed up with it?" Kelly says angrily.

"You need to grow up Kelly really do you think any of this is easy on Bren you won you got me what does she have huh" I yell at Kelly.

"Oh yeah Dylan always stand up for Brenda what about me huh" Kelly yells back.

"What about you Kelly?" I ask.

She looks dumbfounded I look around to see most of the school watching our confrontation.

"I'm sorry Dylan I never thought about what Brenda's been going through" Kelly says sadly.

"That's your problem you don't think now if you don't mind I need to go find Bren to make sure she's okay" I say getting up and leaving the cafeteria.

I immediately spot Brandon and walk over to him.

"Hey, B have you seen your sister" I ask worriedly.

"Naw man is everything okay" Brandon asks worriedly.

"Her and Kelly had some words at lunch and she ran off" I say.

"Oh man was it bad" Brandon asks worriedly.

"Yeah Kelly pretty much screamed at her for forgiving me and not forgiving her" I say.

"Okay you want me to help you look for her" Brandon asks.

"Naw men you go enjoy your lunch" I say heading towards the library.

I search for Brenda the whole lunch period. I know I should have stayed with Kelly but I'm torn as to who matters more. I wanted to comfort Kelly because she's my girlfriend but I can't let Brenda go either. I can't find her so I head to class. That afternoon about 4 Brandon calls to tell me that Brenda's okay.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

I needed to make sure she was okay. I grabbed the keys to my Porsche and opened the door. I slam into Kelly as I'm walking out.

"Dylan I wanted to apologize for the way I acted earlier today" Kelly says nervously.

"You don't owe me an apology you owe Bren one you were rude to her" I say angrily.

"Dylan let's not fight I'd much rather make up" Kelly says sexily.

"I can't right now I have some place to be" I say.

Kelly grabs me by the collar of my shirt and pulls me in for a kiss. At first I resist but then I deepen the kiss. I don't think nothing of it until I hear a throat clear behind us. Kelly turns glaring at the person who interrupted us.

"Sorry , I just wanted to say thanks for looking for me today I really appreciate it" Brenda says nervously looking at her feet.

"Well thanks but we were kind of in the middle of something you can go now" Kelly says dismissively.

"Okay well I'll see you in school tomorrow" Bren says turning to leave.

"Wait, Bren you want to come inside and watch a movie with us" I ask.

"Dylan" Kelly hisses at me angrily.

"If you're sure I'm not intruding I would love to it would be good to hang out like old times" Brenda says happily.

I usher to two girls inside I can tell Kelly is pissed but I ignore it and pick out a movie.

"So Kel how have things been" Brenda says.

"Oh now you want to be my friend" Kelly says angrily.

"I didn't come over here to fight" Brenda says.

"Why did you come over to my boyfriend's house so late at night huh Brenda" Kelly says angrily.

"I think I better go" Brenda says standing up.

"No stay" I say.

"No that's right you stay Bren I'll go" Kelly says jumping up angrily.

"Kelly " I say.

"What Dylan?" Kelly yells angrily.

"I'm going to leave I'll see you at school tomorrow and thanks again for looking for me you're a great friend" Brenda says getting up and running out of the house.

"Thank God she's finally gone now we can get back to what we were doing before she arrived" Kelly says.

"I think you should go home Kelly" I say.

"Dylan" Kelly says pleadingly.

"No, Kelly go home" I say.

"Dylan I'm sorry okay I'll try harder just please don't be made with me" Kelly pleads.

"Go home Kelly I'll see you at school tomorrow" I says shutting the door after she walks out.

I turn off the TV and head to bed.


End file.
